I hate my heart...

I do not understand what love and life has something in common.
Why loving someone means a whole world of living.. and when he hurts you means of dying.
The pain of broken love is like a living death.
And what hurts most is seeing the one you love loving someone else..
Why is there such a word time - when all you can have are tomorrows,
when all you need now is past.
Why is there such a word late - when all i did was to wait.
Why I am so unwise? or this is the right thing for us?
When we were together.. the world is so cruel or was it just hearts are full of grudges.
Why I still ache when I thought I was over you, when i thought I have my life now.
There is no getting over -because inside, my heart cripples.
I do not know love until I met pain..
I can't believe - I made a greatest mistake in my life.
Was it? or better things never yet seen

Love is never blind - it was our choice to be blind.

I don't know where this words are leading.
All i know now - my heart is dying.

A love can never be right again.

Getting Over After A Long Term Relationship.

I have a couple friends who have been lovers since our college days. They become professional in their field. Wedding plans are all set ready. Family and friends are excited.
But a 2 months before the wedding, the girl called the boy and wanted to have break-up. The reason? She has found someone else or perhaps there is more than that. The boy could hardly believe what happened to them. It was just eight years ago, the two were very obviously in love with each other. How could it happen? They both admitted, the past weeks were never good to them. They always argue and never met on same point.

Whatever the reasons of their break-up, many felt dismayed of the eight years relationship.

Break ups could be the most traumatic especially when you had treasure the relationship for long years. It is so hard to get over and moving onward. There is always a great deal of pain and things that reminds of your ex. And there is no way to patch the pain over. No way of winning the love again.

But there are definite ways to move forward and a way to find a new relationship:

1. Hide the things that remind the two of you. Love letters, gifts or anything that has something to do with your ex - keep them in a box and pledge yourself to never open it until you find yourself moving on and ready to a new relationship. In a long run, you can open it again and find yourself laughing of the past.
If forgetting is one thing so hard to to do- burn it all. Harsh am I? yes, it is true. Because keeping those things can make yourself irresistible crying out to them and sometimes could give different meaning to your new partner if ever.

2. Re- arrange your environment.Get time to renovate your house. Bring down old photos and pillows that reminds her. This is true after the marriage or live-in relationship. Transfer to a new house coz sometimes old house still has memories in every corner.

3. Go out for socialization. Have fun. Enjoy your time mingling with friends. As much as possible, it is better to go out with friends or people that has nothing to do about your ex. This would greatly help you to socialize without hesitations and the best way to avoid questions and topic about your ex.

4. No to love music. Yes, when we heard love songs - happiness or pain it still reminds you. We easily recall back the past and cry. Go on patriotic songs or rock music for a while. This sounds so jerky but this is true- best way to deal yourself out of the pain.

5. Have something to keep you busy. If working, push hard to work. Get in early and come home late. If it is ok, you can do the work of others just to please not them-but yourself. If studying, this could be the best way you can go on scanning the old pages of your books. Take more time reading or solving math problems.

6. Just smile even your heart is aching. Never frown because of being left heartbroken. It will just make you ugly and old. It is not good showing your ex how bad things to you since the break up.

Move on. Get a new life. Don't make your days miserable and unfair while your ex has a great time without you.

Remember, it is always great to feel pain and have it cry out loud. It is not bad to cry again when you think of past - this the good way to get in touch with your emotions and self. Thinking what positive sides the pain has brought you.

When Do I Know That It's Time To Let Go

On the rock relationship - Do I have to give up? When do I know it is the right to time to let go?

1. He is ignoring you. Two way communication is the most important to keep the relationship moving and growing. But if the partner refuses to talk to you and continue to ignore you, making out reasons - well, it is a sign of immaturity and pushing you out.

2. One party working. It would not be fair if one party alone is giving out effort of showing care, love and attention to the partner. It must be a both way giving and taking responsibilities. If you feel your partner has been taking you for granted - wake up! do not waste your time to a wasteful person.

3. Attitude changed. As time goes by, as relationship takes long- true attitude comes out. But, take into consideration that loving is not all about joy and laughter. Someones attitudes, points and views, and beliefs can sometimes hurt you. Yet, both should never disregard the feelings and opinions of the partner - respect and love should still govern. If he is very high and might, and sees only his self- make a move.

4. Third party involved. This could be the biggest matter if the problem exist with someone between the two of you.Relationships involves lots of pains and temptations- near or far relationship. Most of relationships end up because of third party. So many reasons and factors behind these, but, if you can forgive and forget - why not? Many says, love is sweeter the second time around.

However, if so much pain and trust has been really broken, then let go. It would never be the same again. Let time moves what will happen next between the two of you.

5. Love lost. Sometimes this happen without knowing you already lost your love for your partner. It is a mere fact that relationship do not stay long just because of LOVE. It is really with a matter of CHOICE between the two of you if you want to stay long-being in love and making a choice. If no love really exist at all, be honest with your partner. Talk about it and how the two of you can deal with it.

Giving up a relationship surely should be time taking and mind whistling. Never do it at one night coz you will regret it forever. Exert effort to fixed things between the two of you, but if you see nothing happens- you must give up. Cry it out and move on. You will see there is much more to see outside.

Early Pregnancy: Do I have to marry?

"My boyfriend and I are both 16 years old. I am pregnant. He is willing to marry me but I am two sided. Both our parents want us to get marry and support us. We are still in college and I have so many plans in mind. If i get marry.. will i be happy? will i not regret it? if i won't marry-what will happen to me? "

So many questions arises when early pregnancy happens. At this stage, some teenagers who find hard to open it up to family tends for abortion or suicide. On the other hand, some parents demands for marriage. Perhaps for a reason to avoid social/community gossips, religion, and family's credibility.

I have a very close friend who get pregnant at the early stage of 18 and both are still in college. They were seem excited to get marry and seem nobody can separate them. Both parents demands for marriage. Actually, they were just 5months way getting to know as boyfriend/girlfriend.

Because of pregnancy, the girl has to stop school. After the birth, the boy decided to take a job to sustain the needs of his family. Well, actually the boy's parents were there always to financially support them. But it was a boy's pride to ought his responsibilities. On the way of marriage life, teenage spirit aroused to the boy's part- hangouts with friends, discos, beer drinkings and marijuana at the end.

These were not handled well, that they started fighting and hurting the girl. After a year the girl decided to come back to his parents. They got their own separate ways. The girl fall in love with someone but cannot marry him (because she is still legally married and applying for divorce is very expensive and long to wait) while her husband is still enjoying the peers with his friends.

The attitude is, marriage is not the answer of pregnancy to teenage couples. Getting marry at early age really changes everything you have planned for. Mostly regrets comes in for many reasons and factors. And only few survives. Well, i guess it is a matter of decision but being pregnant should not be the first basis why you have to marry. Think a lot if both could be responsible enough to be not just a parents but as a husband and wife.

Is he the Right Man for Me?

Been dating long? Wondering if he is the right guy for you? Hard to admit for girls, but these question makes us insecure and began to doubt.

Why don't you pause for a while and think than pursuing long to man you never sure with.

Is he the right one for me?

1. He makes you feel comfortable and value your happiness.

Getting involved in relationship does not mean that we girls should always think and plan of what makes him happy. We should see that out of his effort he can bring at ease and smile to you when you are together. If he seems to be "think of me" - value his own interest and happiness.. duh..forget him.

A successful relationship is with the effort of both partners to give respect and honor. He should be willing to go beyond his own self-interest and sees the value of things and people you hold dear.

2. He gets positive score from your family and friends

You can never know the person well unless you get time to involved with his family and friends. A big factor if he introduce you to his family. With them, you can know how he was at the days of his childhood, teenage, and to the time you were not there yet. By that, you will learn to understand him more.

See the group of friends he has. The kind of activities they are involved with and how his group defines him as a friend.

Introduce him also to your family and friends. Give him a moment to talk and mingle with them out of your effort. Just observe and ask them how he was.

If everything comes positive, well, take a heed and smile. If not, think more and wonder why.

3. He can handle and resolve conflicts.

A relationship can never grow without a test of pain and fights for differences. If a guy pouts out, keep on blaming, and shows sign of withdrawing, it is obvious enough that he is very immature to be serious with you. Both partners should be open for the communication and discuss the reasons. This is a good way to deepen the relationship.

No man could be define as " perfect" but there is always a "right man" just for you. Easy to find, if you make yourself also the right one for him.

Surviving with a Long Distance Relationship

Getting involved with a long distance relationship is not easy as having the one you love close to you. More trials and tests of love comes along the way and surely measures the milestones of the relationship.

How can I survive with a long distance relationship?

1. Make an agreement
This would clearly define what goes between the two of you. Make an agreement of what you expect for the relationship and how much commitment you are willing to give and receive. Be open of what you want and the things you fear of having this type of relationship. In same way, learn to listen and accept his views. Discuss your plans and know where the two of you should meet. Being monogamous in decisions help prevent future misunderstandings and mistakes.

2. Constant Communication
Everyday communication if possible is very important. If not, explain your daily route and financial status so that the other party can understand. Communication like making phone calls is very expensive but a very practical way to directly express your feelings, share interests and bridge the distances. Somehow it fills the missing link in your heart.

3. Mark the important dates
Distance or miles apart doesn't mean having an excuse on forgetting or not celebrating the special days for the two of you. Either anniversary or birthdays these should be marked on your calendar. Sending letters or gifts compensate your absences.

4. Enjoy being alone
Long distance relationship gives lot of advantages. You can spend more time with your self and friends. You can do whatever you want - strolling, mountaineering and getting chance to engage in activities that will build your characteristics and be physically fit. But learn to put limits and remember the agreements the two of you made. Just never do things that will give no good to the relationship.

5. Avoid jealousy, have trust and be faithful
Jealousy is very poisonous that could ruin relationship. It is a mere fact that once we love - we trust the person but jealousy slowly rooted up as time goes. It is hypocrite to say that you never felt jealous. If you do not want to put dead end, better control your jealousy. Trust and jealousy do fight in mind as love is being test.
Trust and faithfulness is a major necessity if you wish a relationship to last long. Just be positive as everything will be better.

5. Avoid temptation
Most commonly, long distance relationships fail because of temptations. Physical temptations

6. Set a limit
Nobody wants to wait forever!
Setting a limit is a very wise decision if you do not want to end up waiting forever. There will come a time when the two of you decide to be seriously get involve in a deeper form of relationship and settle in one place. If settling in one place would be impossible with some acceptable reasons, do plan to see each other on regular basis. This somehow makes you forget the distance apart. But if your partner really loves you, he really wants to be with you.

There could be no better way of knowing the person well but to spend time close to him.