Thursday, January 22, 2009

Early Pregnancy: Do I have to marry?

"My boyfriend and I are both 16 years old. I am pregnant. He is willing to marry me but I am two sided. Both our parents want us to get marry and support us. We are still in college and I have so many plans in mind. If i get marry.. will i be happy? will i not regret it? if i won't marry-what will happen to me? "

So many questions arises when early pregnancy happens. At this stage, some teenagers who find hard to open it up to family tends for abortion or suicide. On the other hand, some parents demands for marriage. Perhaps for a reason to avoid social/community gossips, religion, and family's credibility.

I have a very close friend who get pregnant at the early stage of 18 and both are still in college. They were seem excited to get marry and seem nobody can separate them. Both parents demands for marriage. Actually, they were just 5months way getting to know as boyfriend/girlfriend.

Because of pregnancy, the girl has to stop school. After the birth, the boy decided to take a job to sustain the needs of his family. Well, actually the boy's parents were there always to financially support them. But it was a boy's pride to ought his responsibilities. On the way of marriage life, teenage spirit aroused to the boy's part- hangouts with friends, discos, beer drinkings and marijuana at the end.

These were not handled well, that they started fighting and hurting the girl. After a year the girl decided to come back to his parents. They got their own separate ways. The girl fall in love with someone but cannot marry him (because she is still legally married and applying for divorce is very expensive and long to wait) while her husband is still enjoying the peers with his friends.

The attitude is, marriage is not the answer of pregnancy to teenage couples. Getting marry at early age really changes everything you have planned for. Mostly regrets comes in for many reasons and factors. And only few survives. Well, i guess it is a matter of decision but being pregnant should not be the first basis why you have to marry. Think a lot if both could be responsible enough to be not just a parents but as a husband and wife.



16 comments:

JK said...

The biggest issue here is the fact that both parties involved need to be responsible parents married or not...
Both parents are equally responsible for the well being and up bringing of the child married or not...
Both parties involved had a part in the birth of a child and equally made the choice to do so, once again the child is the most important factor married or not...
The child did not ask to be born into this world with his parents married or not...

Thats only my opinion...

I have a grandson and my daughter is not married, but I tell my daughter both parents should be responsible for his well being...

khaye said...

the baby is a GIFT from God. isipin mo kahit 1 million times kung worth to marry the guy.

Anonymous said...

Just focus to what u want to be. negatif thought or positif thought both are true. choose the better want for u. life is a choosing.. :)

Indo to pinoy
=============
maswa2n
:)

Anonymous said...

Hi, nice post

Anonymous said...

If it must be married, just married, because they should be responsible for the deeds that they do.

Face this life-is and don't make difficult :D

AngeL BeaR said...

marriage is not the only way to solve problems. I knew lots of people who didn't choose marriage, give birth to the baby and then tried to resume back their lives - going back to school, get a diploma/degree, a decent job and raise their babies on their own. It's hard but in the end, they all said its worth it.

Anonymous said...

Marriage is not that simple and is a very serious matter. At a very young age you will soon become a parent and has responsibilities to shoulder. Do you think that you will be happy with your partner for the next 5 years... or the next 10 years? If you find things easy with him then you have to be firm with your decision in marrying your partner. But if not, then settle with your baby and think of marrying on later days. Bearing a child does not hinder you of your plans, but should inspire you.

Anonymous said...

Was here 4 Smile friend, SucceSS!
ur Friend

Nadhifa Rama said...

I think married is also became one answer for being a wise and growing up. If we think we have any responsibility to take care the kid, it means we are also responsible to give her/him a happy family figured, which is best described in dad, mom, and son/daughter.

Married is a Way, to safe the girl/boy, the big family, and the important think, to safe the kid.

Anonymous said...

i agree to khaye. Think a million times if worth marrying the guy

Anonymous said...

if must be married, just married

schizoshrink said...

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Anonymous said...

Hi how are you and your family today?

Anonymous said...

hei..it is nice to visit your blog...nice written... keep blogging :)

Unknown said...

I feel you should stress on the importance of avoiding pregnancy till the teenagers feel they can stand on their own feet and face the world and bring up the new-born baby. Religion, customs, parents' approval, and all other issues are secondary. After all, they have to survive with their own in-born strengths and maturity in this highly competitive world!

Personally I like your blog very much and read your rich contents every time I visit here. You can guide the "rudderless" young generation like many others! I hope you will in the coming articles/posts!

Krishna from Celebrity Females

Maus said...

i like your article here.
thanks for sharing..+
interesting